Monday, April 1, 2013

Lose the 'Tude!!!

If you just looked at these pictures, you'd
think the Idol judges were the ones having
all the fun. You'd be wrong!
The Voice started last week. Because I’m obsessed with The Following on Mondays and I don’t get home til late on Tuesdays, I caught the encore episodes on NBC last night. Almost immediately, I realized why The Voice was the #1 music competition show. It was fun. The judges seemed to be having fun. The contestants seemed to be having fun. I was having fun watching it.

Now move over to FOX and take a look at American Idol. It becomes painfully clear why Idol is experiencing the lowest ratings in the shows history. Yes, they got several ‘big names’ but they also have a ton of unnecessary drama.

On The Voice, the single-monikered newbies, Shakira and Usher, fit in nicely with Blake Shelton and Adam Levine. Yes, it’s a competition, but it’s an enjoyable competition and the chemistry between the four of them is pleasant to watch. In fact, I am liking Shakira, as the resident girl much better than I ever liked Christina Aguilera (especially in her last season when she really let the bitch out of her cage).

On Idol, the only judge I like now is Keith Urban. He’s engaged and enthusiastic. Randy, Nicki and Mariah look like they don’t want to be there. Nicki showed up late for one of the live shows, since then she’s managed to show up promptly but is it any better? Not really. Her crazy, rambling, bitchy commentary is unnecessary (The one she gave about fixing pancakes with syrup and butter on a Saturday morning was the most ridulous thing I've heard in a while). Plus, she has already stated repeatedly that she wants to see all five girls in the top five. Biased much? Great quality in a judge!

Mariah is a joke. She’s literally phoning it in … yes, she’s been caught several times texting during performances. Really? The live shows are an hour-long. She’s being paid a shitload of money (sources say $18 million for one season) for Idol. Crazy idea but maybe just showing up isn’t enough. Try earning the money. Dare I say, work for it? It’s not really a hard job.

Then there is the two of them together. I guess not all train wrecks are that worthy of watching. These two ‘divas’ can’t even stand or sit next to each other. One cringes every time the other one speaks.  Well, I guess no one said topping the charts required maturity.

With the low ratings (which are still pretty damn good), it’s clear that Nicki is not bringing in the younger audience and Mariah doesn’t have the pull everyone thought she would. Neither one of them need to be back next season. In fact, throw Randy out too!

Finally, there is the talent. The Idol formula is no longer working. Effeminate black men, obligatory country girls, a couple of cute white guys, someone who appeals to an ethnic audience (Filipino or Hispanic…)Yawn! The Voice has better talent and it’s not nearly as cookie cutter.

Whether we are talking the not-so-dearly departed (from The Voice) Christina or Ms. Minaj or Queen Carey, the truth of the matter is that when it comes to television ratings or just making good TV show that diva attitude that serves them so well on stage and in the recording studio doesn’t translate to television. If these divas want to do reality TV, they should ditch the competitions and go the way of the Kardashians and The Real Housewives of Whatever. They can build an entire show around diva-tude, bitchiness and grown women acting immaturely. There is definitely a market for that kind of bad behavior, it just isn’t the Idol/Voice market.

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