Monday, April 11, 2011

Celebrity Apprentice: Fool's Gold

Yes, Mark, I'm just as perplexed as you
are. Exactly what does Gary Busey have
to do to get fired?????
If he didn’t know it before, Gary Busey emerged from last week’s boardroom knowing he had a target on his back. He wasn’t happy about that. Yet, the focus quickly turned to the record-setting amount of money the teams made. Focusing on the win/win provided a desperately needed positive vibe.

The Project: This week’s project would be all about Australian Gold sun care products. Both teams would have to work with a 10 x 10 glass box and determine a theme for the products that would start in the box but also incorporate the area outside of the box. They’d be judged on creativity, brand messaging and what was going on outside and around the box.

The PMs: Mark McGrath stepped up quickly for the guys, as did LaToya for the women.

The guys started brainstorming and immediately came up with a pirate theme. They’d dress up as pirates and feature lots of hot chicks! In true rocker fashion, Mark stated, “You can never get enough chicks.” Meat Loaf, when noting that ASAP had a former Playmate of the Year on their team, said the guys had to “fight cleavage with cleavage.”

In the first of several significant moments, Gary Busey gave everybody a creepy feeling. When the representatives from Australian Gold came to talk with the guys, he interjected, “It [Australian Gold products] gives you a sexual feeling.” Immediately I got a scary visual of Gary using some Australian Gold lotion to feel ‘sexual’ and threw up in my mouth a little bit. You could see one of the female representatives actually squirming in her chair (I think she had the same visual).

In a wise move, Mark sent Gary and Lil Jon (to babysit Gary) to the costume store while he, John Rich and Meat, got down to the business of the task. When they met with the builders for the box, they knew exactly what they wanted and the builders got busy creating it.

Their box looked good. The costumes worked and the boys even had a jingle/chant about Australian Gold. Tons of fun, great energy, everything was going well until the AG reps showed up and Gary hijacked them. He went on one of his passionate, rambling, nonsensical speeches and then started trying to pitch himself as an Australian Gold spokesperson. When Mark, tried to come over and redirect the conversation and get it back on task, Gary gave him a little shove. Eventually, the guys did get it back on track, but the damage had been done.

Speaking of damages, ASAP’s brainstorming was more like brain drizzling – very light and misty. La Toya eventually came up with a gold guy and girl (models) painted in gold and having fun in the sun. It wasn’t original, but no one had anything else. It was almost as if the girls (especially Nene and Star) wanted to lose so they could get rid of her.

Since this seemed right up Hope’s alley, even though it was cold, she offered to be the bikini girl. La Toya didn’t agree. Apparently, she thought a former Playmate of the Year would be better utilized as a shopper on the task instead of the face (and body) of the task.

With no clear vision, they headed into their meeting with the builders of the box. The looks on the builders’ faces were priceless as they quickly realized that the plan was that there was no plan. The girls ended up making their own box.

The only thing La Toya really wanted was sand. She wanted lots and lots of sand. She called Nene and asked them to bring 125 fifty pound bags of sand to the site. Marlee did some quick math and determined that was over 6,000 pounds!

At the last minute, La Toya, scared that her idea wasn’t creative enough, added a snow scene to her ’vision’ because you need sun screen on snowy days too. So they had a box with a gold painted guy fanning a girl and outside the box a beach volleyball game to one side and snow on the other. And this was creative?

No it wasn’t and when Donald Jr. popped by the display Nene couldn’t wait to tell them how badly her team sucked and what a terrible project manager La Toya was. And, … she did it while holding up the head of the koala costume she had to wear.

Of course, before the boardroom the Australian Gold reps had to talk to Trump about the winner. They too had hoped that Hope would show off her ass…ets for Australian Gold.

Against all odds ASAP one and La Toya lived to annoy her team yet another day … if Nene didn’t kill her first. The women were dismissed and went to watch the proceedings on TV. Instead of being happy about pulling out a win, Nene went after La Toya for going after her in the boardroom (even though Nene has gone after La Toya with every opportunity she’s had … including the koala conversation with Donald Jr). She called La Toya “old” and told her she needed to act her age. She also called her “Casper the Ghost” which was hateful but kind of true (you know how those Jacksons love to look light!).

Mark McGrath threw himself on the sword saying if the pirate theme was the problem that he’d be the one who had to go. When Trump asked his team who should go everyone agreed … Gary. So it came down to Mark and Gary and even though he hasn’t contributed anything to any project (but kookiness), Trump kept Gary and fired Mark McGrath (who is crazy hot when he doesn’t have his hair slicked back Gordon Gekko style).

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